In this world, there are a few things we know beyond the shadow of a doubt.
The earth is round. Donald Trump will most likely kill us all. Sofia Vergara is one of the most attractive people in the history of people.
And while certain celebrities may dispute the first thing, and while that second thing is pretty pressing, let’s just focus on Sofia for right now, OK?
Sofia and her overwhelming, undeniable, all-encompassing hotness.
“But why are we talking about how beautiful Sofia Vergara is?” you may be wondering. “Everybody already knows all about it.”
And if you are wondering that, you have a good point.
But the reason we are taking the time to sing this woman’s praises today is because — brace yourself — she just posed nude.
Really, she did that:
This is the cover of Women’s Health first ever Naked Issue, and it’s … well, it sure is something.
And naturally, so was the interview that accompanied the cover.
Sofia, who, let’s be real, is always fun in interviews, says that she’s told her rep, “I’m going to be 45 years old! Stop putting me in naked things! Let me age with dignity!”
“People say, ‘Oh, you look like you’re in your twenties,’” she continues. “Well, it’s not true.”
She says that her skin is different now than it was when she was younger — “I had never thought of the word ‘pore,’ then I’m like, ‘Sh-t! What do I do with these?’”
But although she’s older than she once was, and although she has recently become acquainted with the concept of pores, she still wanted to do this nude cover.
“Here’s a woman, 45, being able to show her body,” she explains. “It’s not like before, when it was just young girls.”
At another point in the interview — actually at several points — she brings up her husband, Joe Manganiello.
“One of the first things Joe told me when we started dating was, ‘I like how you’re always very well put together,’” she remembers.
“He said, ‘I’ve had girlfriends that are all day long prancing around the house in sweats, no makeup.’ I’m not saying that’s bad; it’s great.”
But she says that “For good or for worse, it’s the way I grew up: accept yourself but also be better than yourself.”
Joe seems to be especially into physical fitness — she also says that he built a gym in their home, and she works out three or four times a week.
“It’s like torture for me,” she confesses. “I’m in a bad mood two hours before, I’m in a bad mood while I’m doing it, I’m in a bad mood at the end because I have to schedule the next class.”
Oh, Sofia, you’ve never been more relatable.
And, just for fun, a story about boobs:
Sofia says that before the photo shoot for the cover, she was sent some photos of potential poses — as she describes it, “They’re all of tall models holding their boobs with one arm.”
“But I can barely cover my boobs with two arms — I’m a 32-triple-D!”
Then, right in the middle of the restaurant where the interview took place, she grabs a hold of her chest and says “My boobs are real, and I had a baby.”
“If I grab them, I can’t even cover the nipple!”
Never change, Sofia.