A Nigerian man and Twitter user @ayobankole is shaking the biggest table in Africa which is the ‘table of patriarchy’, as he recounted an experience in church today.
According to the man, his church’s Pastor asked a question which left many men in support of patriarchy, showing their known sides with their replies. @ayobankole said the question was “If a man earns 150k in Lagos, & woman earns 750k in Kaduna, who should resign & relocate after marriage?”
Read his tweet below and replies from some men;
So my Pastor just asked men in church: “If a man earns 150k in Lagos, & woman earns 750k in Kaduna, who should resign & relocate after marriage?”. Some men insisted the woman should relocate. Na patriarchy dey cause poverty for many men oo!
Imagine make person open him eye see poverty korokoro, & you use leg waka inside because of ego. I felt like slapping the man beside me that raised his hand in support of woman relocating. Oshi o da! Tscheeww
Ayeeee!!! What a sunday! Some men are legit in my mentions defending why the woman should resign because “it is a natural order for the man to give”. Ogun kill nature, Ogun kill order, Ogun kill giving. What is wrong with receiving??
From some men’s reactions to this tweet,I see a huge problem. Men think that it’s just being solely financially responsible in the home that earns a woman’s respect.They also think a wife earning more than them is a problem. Myopic thinking. This isn’t theory,I’ve seen it happen.
I know countless men that have left their jobs to relocate to meet their wives, because their wives had a better life. They eventually caught up, because they had the competence & intellectual acumen. Don’t stick your family in poverty cos of ego. It’s stupid.
A woman will default to you if she knows you are superior intellectually & emotionally, & more importantly, if she knows you are responsible and have her back. If your wife earns 5x more, it creates room for you to chase your dreams, & vice versa. Don’t be trapped in patriarchy.
What really matters is understanding, love, & your own capabilities & behavioural patterns as a man. All of these ofcourse should have been established before marrying. But always remember, it’s not only the money – you can have more money & wifey still disrespects you.