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“What an A*s! Gawd! What a delicious-looking a*s!” I heard my heart exclaim as I flicked through the bible on my pulpit-stand while waiting for Sis. Fidelia to finish with the bible pa*sage I had asked her to read!

“Thou shall not commit adultery…” she read out loudly from the middle of the church where her seat was located! But mehn, I was barely giving her any ear!

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I desperately wished I could throw Sis. Abigail’s backside another glance from the pulpit where I was standing, but then didn’t just know how I would go about it without the entire congregation noticing! Her a*s was just impeccable! Notoriously curved backwards like a sickle, and still ‘aerodynamically’ streamlined into one of the most flared hips I’ve ever seen in my life! Jesu Kristi!

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How was I supposed to let this ma*sive ‘thing’ just go untouched?! Ladies are bloody dangerous, you know! And I mean, even when they sincerely don’t want to be!

“Thou shall not covet your neighbour’s wife…” Sis. Fidelia’s voice continued reading; I didn’t even know when she read the preceding two commandments! Simply because my mind was sooo torn between Sis. Abigail’s buttocks and clear reality!

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