“Pastor…” I heard Cindy whisper again for yet another time. “Pastor, are you there?”
I held my breath! I held it so tightly! I sincerely hoped I wouldn’t answer! I honestly hoped! But it was just hope, isn’t it? Hope can only take you so far!
“Pastor Dan?” she would only get more compulsive!
I remained still; no motion, no words and no air! The expectation was for me to turn around; not remain still. The expectation was for me to walk back upstairs and forget I even got here! But I wasn’t moving; I remained stiff!
Her tiny tingly voice graced my ears. The same voice that had brought weakness to my knees a lot of times! I shut my eyes in the darkness, feeling its tininess re-echo deep into my wandering searching thoughts! That search for justification! That search for good excuse!
“Please Pastor Danny…” it now appeared closer! Was she coming off her bed? “Please Pastor, just this last time…” Cindy was coming off her bed!
My heart kept beating harder! Maybe harder than the hard wooden doorpost into which I was leaning! It was happening again! It was likely just only a matter of time now! But could I say, I was surprise?